Combating Stress with Hypnosis

There can be many factors contributing to poor health, but one major cause is stress. When we are under stress, our autonomic nervous systems switch into survival mode, slowing down functions that are not essential to surviving. These include the immune, digestive, and reproductive functions. This is why people who are chronically stressed get sick more easily and heal more slowly, develop ulcers and digestive problems, and experience irregular menstrual cycles, infertility, and sexual dysfunction. A form of hypnosis called guided meditation can be an effective means of combating this stress.

Few of us experience true danger in our daily lives, but our nervous systems react to traffic, time constraints, loud noises, and other stimuli in the same way that we used to respond to bears, battles, and other dangers. Stress causes the body to prepare for fighting, fleeing, or freezing, not growing, eating, and reproducing. To bring these normal, healthy functions back online, we need to shut off the survival response. We can do that by relaxing, but many people find that to be more easily said than done.

True relaxation requires mental and physical relaxation. Most of us know how to relax physically but many of us find it hard to relax mentally. Even while receiving a massage, for example, our minds might be active. A mind full of worries or woes is triggering all the same physical stress responses that a massage, a bath, a game of golf, a beer, etc., is trying to remedy. Unless we can quiet the mind, the body cannot achieve complete relaxation.

The best way to quiet the mind is meditation. While there are many different styles of meditation, most people find it easiest to begin with a guided meditation. Most forms of meditation focus on clearing the mind of all thought or focus the mind on a single concept or mantra. In guided meditation, the thoughts are directed. Because the imagination is engaged, guided meditation is actually a form of hypnosis rather than true meditation.

Guided meditation combines progressive relaxation with positive imagery. The progressive relaxation induces a hypnotic state, thereby switching the nervous system out of survival mode into growth mode. The positive imagery then redirects the mind away from obsessive thoughts towards peaceful thoughts, such as imagining a beautiful garden. Since it addresses the needs of both the mind and the body, guided meditation helps you relax both mentally and physically.

By consistently practicing guided meditation, your body will gradually learn what a normal, healthy state feels like. If you have been stressed for a long time, you body may have become stuck in fight or flight mode. Guided meditation will help you to retrain your body to switch out of survival mode so it will become less responsive to stressors and recover more quickly when exposed to them. Your mind will be more peaceful when you replace an active mind with a peaceful mind. Between the mental and physical benefits of guided meditation, you'll feel calmer and more in control of your life, and your immune, digestive, and reproductive functions will flourish.

Afformations

There are all kinds of therapy available to help you change your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors: hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, art therapy, music therapy, and more. One kind of therapy you can do by yourself is bibliotherapy. Perhaps you know how wonderful it feels to read a good book and escape into another world for a little while. That is one kind of bibliotherapy, but I am talking about self-help books.

You may think self-help books are not for you, but even business books can be considered self-help. Anything that helps you achieve your goals, that teaches you tips and secrets to get ahead or to approach challenges in a new way, is a self-help book. By reading a good self-help book, you can learn how to transform and release your perceived or actual limitations.

There is no shortage of self-help books on the market. Many of them are repetitive or insubstantial and some are even damaging or absurd, so it takes some wading through to find a good one. I am currently reading The Secret Code of Success by Noah St. John. The "secret" St. John presents is the concept of afformations. Afformations is a play on affirmations. In hypnosis, we use affirmations (positive statements) to change the way we think about ourselves. For example, if you often think "I'm a failure," you use the affirmation "I'm a success" to reverse that thought. Every time you start to think "I'm a failure," you substitute the affirmation. This can help over time if there is no benefit to thinking you're a failure. If there is a perceived benefit, then that belief would need to be examined through hypnotherapy or other means to release it. For example, being a "failure" may mean not having to try again, not having to change, not having to work, not having to move or leave home, not having to succeed, not having to maintain success, not having to be visible/responsible/independent/etc. There could be lots of subconscious benefits to being a failure. Until those perceived benefits are exposed and transformed, affirmations will never work.

In his book, St. John talks about afformations, which are questions rather than statements. Afformations are positive questions stated in the past tense, as though the goal has already been achieved. When we ask ourselves a question, our brain starts looking for an answer. For example, what did you eat for lunch yesterday? Your brain is looking for that answer now. By asking yourself an afformation, your brain starts looking for the answer. If there isn't an answer yet, then your brain will try to come up with a solution, like solving a riddle. This is how inventors, scientists, entrepreneurs, and other creative people work. By asking afformations, you are using your own creative subconscious mind to find solutions. St. John compares this to typing a few words into a search engine, like Google, and sending the query off to the internet.

So, to relate this to the example above, if you ask yourself, "Why am I such a failure?" your brain will start looking for answers to that question. Any answers you get are sure to be negative. If you transform that to a positive question, you would ask, "Why am I such a success?" and your brain would start looking for answers to that question instead. To make this an afformation, you would state it in the past tense or state it as if it were already achieved, such as "Why did I become such a success?" or "Why does success come so easily to me now?" This will get your creativity flowing so you can come up with even more answers. You might surprise yourself.

This is not all you have to do. Afformations is the "secret" in the book, but there are several steps that St. John outlines in his book to help you achieve your goals using afformations. It's a clear and handy self-help book with an interesting twist on the use of affirmations. If you like affirmations, use afformations to see if you can go even further. If you like to read, check out The Secret Code of Success. If you'd like to become a success, read the book, use afformations, and work through the action steps.

Starting Afresh

Happy New Year! I hope 2010 has started off well for you. If not, here are two things to keep in mind. One is that it's never to late to have a happy childhood, and the other is that life is a journey.

When I read the books Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman and Negaholics by Cherie Carter-Scott, I recognized myself in many of the descriptions of negative people and negative patterns. I remember a conversation I had with one of my friends in 1994. She called me a pessimist and I said I was a realist. Her response? "All of us experience reality in our own way, but your way is negative."

I didn't agree with her and didn't feel I needed to change at that time... and perhaps I didn't. That world view worked for me at that point in my life. I was young and life was good. But eventually, seeing the world that way did not work for me, so I worked on adopting a more positive outlook. Books like the ones I mentioned above helped me see that thinking negatively was not helpful and was in fact quite harmful both mentally and emotionally. My negative outlook affected me physically as well. I needed to change.

One thing to change was the way I looked at the past. If you have experienced a negative event and you expect the future to be the same, then you naturally tend to be pessimistic. So it helps to revise your memory of the past. Instead of looking at the bad points, think about what you learned or gained from a negative experience.

I understand you may have had a serious trauma in the past. I did too. But there are people who came out of Auschwitz able to love again, able to trust again, able to succeed. Nelson Mandela came out of prison able to forgive and able to lead. These people are not divine masters. They are ordinary human beings. If they can move on from the past, then surely you can too. It takes time and effort but it is possible. When you can look back and see the good points or the learning points of your life, the future seems less scary. You can slowly dial down the negativity until you find that you no longer see the world so negatively anymore. You can have a happy childhood by reframing the way you see the past.

When you feel better about the past, it will be easier to face the future. Now go out and make it a happy new year!

Attitude of Gratitude

When I first began to study energy healing in 2002, my Reiki teacher told me it was important to keep the 'attitude of gratitude' in my daily life. I was learning Reiki to treat chronic pain. Since chronic pain causes depression, I did not feel I had a lot to be grateful for at the time. Furthermore, within the month, I tore a ligament in my knee while skiing. With this new additional source of pain, I felt even less grateful. I also started having increased stress at work due to my limited mobility and frequent absences for doctor's visits and physical therapy. It seemed like trouble upon trouble, which made the attitude of gratitude seem unattainable.

However, even in the midst of this, I had a lot to be grateful for. The first doctor we visited suggested we inject my knee with pain medication and forcibly straighten the leg. My husband, a competitive skier familiar with knee injuries, knew this did not sound right. He refused treatment, and we left the hospital. It is extremely unusual to refuse a doctor's treatment in Japan, but he did, and I benefited.

As soon as we got home, my husband searched the Internet for a doctor specializing in knee injuries in our area. The second doctor said the ligament would have torn further if we had followed the first doctor's advice. If that had happened, I would have needed surgery to fix it. As it was, the only treatment I needed was medication for the pain and swelling. I am extremely grateful to my husband for his intervention. I'm also grateful that I could use the Reiki I had just learned to reduce pain and promote healing in the knee.

When I started physical therapy, which lasted six months, many friends and colleagues told me I would have permanent pain and limited mobility in my knee. It's amazing how many people want to tell you their own horror stories when something bad happens to you. They may think it is helpful, but it's not. I see this happen again and again to my clients, who come in traumatized by the advice of seemingly well-meaning people. It's important to ignore this information and focus on healing, which I did. Within two years, I had overcome the constant dull ache in my knee. Within three years, I was skiing better than I ever had before. I'm grateful that I completely recovered from the injury.

The chronic pain that led me to learn Reiki spurred me along a healing path that eventually led to hypnotherapy. Once I learned hypnotherapy, I was able to reduce pain and inflammation anywhere in my body at any time for extended periods of time. I was free from carrying around pain-relieving ointments and pills. I didn't need days of rest to recover from bouts of intense pain. Hypnotherapy was so much faster and longer-lasting than pain medication that I suddenly had a lot more hours of activity than I was used to. I am grateful that Reiki led me to hypnotherapy, and I'm grateful that hypnotherapy improved the quality of my life so significantly.

I cannot say I am glad I tore the ligament in my knee, but I am grateful that what started off as a negative experience did not get worse. Even better, it turned into a positive one. I am grateful that I learned so much from the experience, including how to ski better! Seven years later, I now find it easy to keep the attitude of gratitude in my life, and I am much happier as a result.

If you have trouble keeping the attitude of gratitude in your life, I recommend keeping a journal with a nightly gratitude list. Make a list of everything that is going well in your life. These can be small things like 'I caught the train on time' or 'The sushi at lunch was really fresh' to bigger things like 'I got a raise at work' or 'My baby is healthy.'

You can also write down any and all benefits that have come out of a negative situation. Write as many things as you can on your list. Repeat them from day to day as you add new things, so that your list grows even longer. The more attention you pay to what's good in your life, the more gratitude you will feel in all areas of your life. Instead of focusing on pain, you'll be focusing on joy. That is the attitude of gratitude.

Get Fit with Word Power

I hate to exercise. I always have. But... I love to ski, I love to swim, I love to take long walks and hikes. Just don't call it exercise! That word takes all the fun away for me. Why is that? It's because I think of exercise as work but skiing as fun. The subconscious mind moves away from pain towards pleasure, so we naturally choose to do things that are fun and avoid those that aren't. We are hard-wired that way. That's why many people who hate exercise will walk around a mall or a museum for hours. That's fine; they are still exercising! They just aren't calling it that.

If you need to exercise, but don't like the images or feelings that the word exercise conjures up, then stop using it. Use the name of the sport or activity you enjoy, such as racquetball or hula dancing. Each time you say exercise, you are undermining your will power. Each time you say hula dancing, you are reinforcing your will power. This strategy puts the hard-wiring of your subconscious mind to work for you.

This word game is also effective for making healthy food choices. Many restaurants have dressed up ordinary dishes by giving them a fancy name, and many mothers have disguised vegetables by using funny names. Studies* have shown that people are more likely to eat chicken or spinach when they're called slow-roasted free-range chicken or Popeye Power. If you don't like salad very much, then calling it rabbit food will not make it more appealing to you. On the other hand, calling it a fresh green salad or a crunchy garden salad might.

The most effective word substitution for your fitness plan is changing the word have to choose. If you have to do something, it generally isn't fun any more. If you choose to do something, then you can motivate yourself more easily. If you make a regular habit of saying choose to instead of have to, you'll find that you can overcome your resistance and feel purposeful and proactive.

Word choices are important. When you begin to use positive word choices, you will find it easier to move towards your goal and stay on the path to success. Here's to a healthier you!

* Please see the book Mindless Eating by Brian Wansink.

Reading, Writing, Self-Confidence

You can achieve anything when you put your mind to it. How many times have we heard that or a variation of it? We may have heard it from parents, teachers, coaches, or friends. We read it in newspapers and hear it in films. Unfortunately, many of us lack the confidence to believe we can have a fraction of what we want, let alone all of it. Without confidence, most goals will remain unattainable. So how can we develop self-confidence?

One of the best ways to start developing your self-confidence is to gather evidence of all of your skills and talents. Make a list, and then read and rewrite it frequently. By gathering this evidence, you begin to appreciate yourself. By reading it over frequently, you reaffirm your self-appreciation. By writing it over repeatedly, the evidence filters down to the subconscious so that you can begin to believe in yourself.

In making your list, the first step is to think about your past and current situation. Think back all the way to the time you were small up to the present day. What did you used to do well or do well now? What awards, scholarships, commendations, or other special recognitions have you received? What skills have enabled you to succeed professionally, socially, athletically, etc.? What leadership roles have you held in professional, social, or other organizations? What makes you unique? Write all of this down.

The second step is to think in a larger circle. Think about those who love, like, respect, or care about you. What do you think they like about you? What are you complimented on? What do you have that others envy? What nice, thoughtful, or helpful things have you done for others? What can you do as well as or better than anyone else you know or admire? Write all of this down on your list.

Once you have exhausted your own thoughts, the third step is to ask close friends and family members to check over your list and add their suggestions. Ask them the same kind of questions you asked yourself. This will help them to think of a wider range of skills and talents, including those that they might have otherwise overlooked. Write this on your list.

Now that you have a lengthy and informative list full of ways in which you are unique and special, the fourth step is to believe that this is true. Every day, you will read over your list, add to it, and copy it out again by hand. By reading it, you are seeing visual proof of your worthiness. By adding to it, you are increasing your awareness of how special you are. By writing it out, you are internalizing the information. This repetition will send the evidence down to your subconscious, where it will take root. Your confidence will begin to grow and flourish as a result.

Building self-confidence takes time. If you give up too quickly or too easily, then you are telling yourself that you are not worthwhile, that you don't deserve to feel good about yourself. That is not true. You do deserve to feel good about yourself. By taking the actions above, you can begin to believe in yourself. Once you believe in yourself, you can achieve anything you put your mind to.

Portable Home

Now that summer is upon us, many people look forward to having time to return home. For many Japanese, this means traveling to the countryside during the Obon holiday. For many foreigners, it means flying overseas.

It's wonderful to have a place where you can feel 100% at home. Unfortunately, many Tokyo residents feel like we have to travel someplace else to feel that way. Why should it be that home is someplace other than where we live?

When we are at peace with who we are, we feel at home no matter where we are. We are able to adapt to different cultural, professional, or social expectations and demands without losing our sense of self. By remaining true to ourselves, the feeling of being at home becomes portable.

We can remain true to ourselves by taking time daily to reflect, meditate, or pray. Quiet time for ourselves is often undervalued and overlooked, but it's essential to developing and maintaining a sense of peace and balance. Time spent reading, listening to music, watching tv, or exercising does not count as quiet time. These are activities that stimulate the mind, rather than quieting it.

If you choose to reflect, this does not mean judging yourself. Reflection means recalling pleasant memories, noting progress or achievements, or dreaming of the future. If you choose to meditate, this does not mean you follow your thoughts when they intrude. Instead, you just notice them as they arise, then let them go and return your focus to your breathing or mantra. If you choose to pray, this does not mean focusing on what you lack and begging for assistance. Prayer means expressing gratitude for prayers answered and then turning your problems over to God.

By taking time daily to reflect, meditate, or pray, you will come to know and understand yourself more fully. As a result, you will find it much easier to remain true to yourself. You will develop a sense of calm and peace that you can carry with you. When you make time to quiet your mind, you cultivate a sense of being at home in your own body. That is something you can carry with you wherever you go.

Think Positive

There are many benefits to positive thinking, but negative thinking has it benefits too. For example, when you design a product or launch a company, you need to believe it will succeed, but you also need to think of everything that could possibly go wrong so you can prepare for and prevent it. That's a good balance of positive and negative thinking.

Unfortunately, for many of us, positive and negative thinking can fall out of balance. Some people might be overly optimistic when some negative thinking would be useful. Fortunately, optimistic people bounce back from problems easily because they know the next time will be better. On the other hand, pessimistic people who encounter problems find it harder to bounce back because they expect the next time will be the same or worse. This can lead to further negativity.

Negative thinking can lead to excessive self-doubt and self-criticism. Self-doubt can be useful. If you think your public speaking skills aren't up to par, you might be motivated to work on improving them. Self-criticism can help you refine your techniques. But excessive self-doubt and self-criticism can lead to an erosion of self-esteem and self-confidence. Negative thinking that continually undermines your ability to value and believe in yourself is not productive and can lead to depression. You can halt and repair the damage by replacing negative statements with positive statements.

This may sound too easy to you. It may sound like it would never work. The fact is you may have already spent many years telling yourself negative messages or hearing them from someone else. Repetition bypasses our critical thinking and gets ideas into the subconscious. This is why commercials and nursery rhymes are repeated over and over. The good news is that repeating positive messages to yourself can override and rebuild the confidence that has been eroded. Hypnosis and hypnotherapy can speed up the process considerably.

Weight Loss Roadblocks

How many of us would like to lose a little weight so we can look and feel better?

Maintaining a healthy weight requires motivation and dedication. While most people have plenty of both when they embark on a weight loss plan, many give up before reaching their goals or stop paying attention to their health as soon as they do reach their goals. After taking a little break and gaining as much or more weight back, they try again with another program, diet, or workout plan... until they give up again. Does this describe you?

One reason that people give up is that they focus on weight loss. If you keep telling yourself you need to lose weight over and over like a mantra, your subconscious mind takes this literally. Subconsciously, you start to think, 'Oh, I lost something; I had better go find it!' This can lead to weight gain. It's better to focus on returning to the best weight for you. This is an idea your subconscious can support without undermining your conscious efforts.

Another reason that people give up is that they may use food to comfort themselves or their weight may serve as a protective barrier. Sometimes this is conscious, but often it is not. If your subconscious mind wants to eat large amounts of comfort foods or maintain that protective barrier, your conscious efforts to eat right are going to be overruled. To lose weight, these subconscious beliefs must be released. Once those are gone, it's easier to stay on track and achieve your goals.

Weight loss is one of the top concerns of most people-- and one of the top three uses of hypnosis. Hypnotherapy can release the subconscious beliefs that are sabotaging your weight loss efforts and bring your conscious and subconscious mind into alignment so that you can achieve your goals.

Be Happy!

No matter what initially causes a person to embark on a journey of self-improvement, the underlying goal is always the same: to be happy. People seek to make a change when they have reached a limit on their pain and suffering, when they are bored with the current state of affairs, or when they feel a yearning to get more out of life. They are seeking fulfillment, contentment, and satisfaction-- synonyms of happiness.

One woman dedicated a year of her life to following all of the advice from various self-help books and turned it into a blog called The Happiness Project. You can find all kinds of useful ideas about how to become happy at her site.

After you read through and implement some of the advice, you might find you get stuck in places or you just can't seem to progress as far as you'd like. If you have made a conscious effort to be happy and you have not reached your goal, this is when hypnotherapy can be the most effective. 

Hypnotherapy removes the roadblocks to happiness by enabling access to the subconscious part of our minds. All of our negative beliefs about ourselves are stored in the subconscious. Using hypnosis, we can find those negative beliefs and release them. When the subconscious and conscious parts of our minds are in agreement about what we want, this is when lasting change can take place. True happiness is attainable; it's as close as we believe it to be.